Sunday, April 8, 2012

Love of the Different vs. Love of the Same




1.       Lakape is Love of the different – the love of different ideas, subcultures, individuals, races, ethnic groups, genders and more.

2.       Real love is more than idea and is more than the idea of love. When love is kept in the realm of ideas it is more akin to morality, ethics, principles. Love is an emotional attachment to another, morality is about ideals in regards to the treatment of others. Lakape is thus more than an idea, it is the real connection of affection with the different.

3.       Opposite is the "love of the same" from which most philosophies and religions proceed. In this form of love the other is seen as the same as you, thus we have universal community or family. In this love we are all the same and thus we are loving ourselves in a sense. And thus pain to others is pain to ourselves too, ala empathy. Love of the same moves from love of a specific type or the familiar or family to the higher universal love. This solves a problem and at the same time leaves us a problem. 

4.       However, love of the different takes another tack and loves what is different and thus unknown or unknowable because it is different from us. Lakape is loving someone or something very different from us on its own terms. This love is equally needed in the world. And this love is evolutionary because we are dealing with new things, new behaviors, new communication, new relationships. This love deals with a world of differentiation. Love of the same reduces the reality of evolution, change and differentiation. It is shy of adventure and new challenges. It is conservative.

5.       Lakape truly appreciates, respects, defends the different. Love of the same may try to escape difference to avoid a confrontation with what is not the same, and thus unknown or unknowable. Love of the same will not deal with the issue of difference and diversity and thus, even when in the universal love mode it has embraced all humanity, but it has not embraced differences amongst all humanity.

6.       Love of the same may at some point find that its belief in similarity is too broad, that difference is greater and more important than it originally had thought, that universal love can lead to a regimentation of human beings. Hopefully at this point, love of the different can be released.

7.       On the other side, once we embrace a difference we may then try to break it down and find similarities in an attempt to understand it and even synthesize the differences into the individual's paradigm. The process makes the formerly unknown now known, but also can import certain unknowable aspects that the person may never fully understand but can utilize and mimic. This is the paradox of synthesis -- as we embrace new things we may not fully understand the mindset or cause of this new thing because we did not generate this new thing, someone else did.

8.       In any case, the two loves, love of the different and love of the same coexist and if properly combined can bind together the Human race and create new paradigms, new wholes. Individuals, ethnic groups, races, genders and more are both different and the same, so two strategies are required. With the consequent method of using both kinds of love we can make sure no soul is left out or passes through the net of loves.

9.       Each love has its benefits. Lakape stresses joy in difference, stresses novelty, learning, synthesis and more. Love of the same offers joy in similarity so we do not have learning or synthesis, though we have a dwelling on something preexisting, eternal, universal, quintessential, unchanging.

10.   However, in general, Lakape pushes out the boundaries of human connection. Why? When confronted with the different, it is immediately open, happy and enthusiastic.

11.   Love of the same when meeting the different, meeting the stranger has angst, it must spend its time stripping away the difference to find some basic similarity it can seize. It struggles for familiarity, it is timid, it is conservative and cautious. But love of the same is the other half of the duality, and when it does its work, then we have a relationship with another person cemented with both kinds of love.

12.   One love seeks change and evolution, the other love wants stability and grounding. One love wants variety and exception, the other love wants pattern and regulation. One love wants synthesis, the other love wants simplicity. One love seeks strangers, the other love wants family. One love wants a kind of disorder, the other love wants a kind of order. One love is dynamic and temporal, the other love is still and eternal. One love engages the world, the other love is retreating. One love focuses on the specific, the particular, and the other love wants the abstract universal.

Cage Innoye

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